An Hour Later, The Story's Hungry For Chinese Again

The chair would see Scott sitting down upon it and rereading the previous episode.

"I don't know what's weirder," Scott would muse to himself. "The sentence 'Scott lost his virginity that night, almost immediately upon entering the woman's apartment'? Or the thought that a guy named Chen isn't Chinese. I wonder if my dad, Deng Xiao Chen, and my mom, Mai Liao Chen, know."

Scott took out his Haier cell phone, manufactured in his home country of China, and called his parents in China, remembering to speak Mandarin to them, since, like Scott, they were Chinese, from that part of China where they spoke Mandarin. After a short conversation, he snapped the phone shut with a snap.

"23 skidoo, that settles that," he pondered. "Maybe a Caucasian kid adopted by Chinese parents could be a Caucasian kid with a Chinese name," he hypothesized, "but that didn't happen to me, as Mom found that seeing me being born firsthand was a long and excruciating experience. She said the doctor said I left claw marks on her uterus, whatever that is, too. Funny... I guess Dad's basket of condoms ran out."

Scott perked up. "This sure saves me from reading a lot of completely unnecessary episodes in the future. Who knows, it might even save my life," he told Sammy the cat, after taking a few more pictures of it. "I guess Krissy and I can live happily ever after, assuming I don't keep dropping her when she wraps her legs around my waist."

1. Scott discovers that picking up Krissy from the floor is harder than picking her up from the bar.
2. Krissy gets a job in retail, loses part of her hand in a seafood accident, and gets knocked up in a one-night stand from a karaoke bar.
3. Suspicious that Krissy may be being unfaithful, Scott looks under her bed and finds more of her g-spots.
4. Roger takes a safety pin, breaks into Scott's apartment and pokes holes in all the condoms in the basket.
5. UPS drops off a package meant for the huge blond guy next door. The package contains a fire alarm and some extra-large safety vests.

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