Out of Context Problems

"Wherever she is, there is my Eden," he said in a most solemn and truthful voice one cannot help but see as he whole heartedly believes in.

Rei

Sigh, ‘tis finally done and must say I am very glad for THAT!

I know there are times when one must hold one’s tongue and times when one’s voice must be heard. But let me tell you here and now there had been a TON of things (snide comments being the least) I wanted to say to some of those . . .

Utterly batsh*t insane lunatics…. Don’t make me go into detail about some of the more. . .hairy parts of today’s presentation when some rather unwelcome gate crashers just had to go and try to ruin things.

"The Inquisition just HAD to overhear what’s been going on and jump to the wrong conclusions," I mutter darkly to myself.

Truly, if the Imperium could somehow have harness how fast rumor travels (especially rumors of Heresy), then they would truly be an INTERGALATIC power to be feared and loathed throughout the known universe instead of just being a local menace in the Milky Way.

Yes, you understand me correctly. I am NOT a fan of Warhammer 40K and found NOTHING in the various factions I’d want to associate with at all in real life. Hey, Betty and Ragan loved Blake 7 but nearly had panic attacks when faced with the idea of experiencing it for real. It is almost worse for me and my sisters because we don’t even LIKE this place…

If it hadn’t been for the Emperor himself (who Horus trusts and thus we trust by extension him ONLY because of that), then we would have vamoosed a LONG time ago and tried our luck elsewhere in completing our Quest.

Not sure exactly who that joker was from the Inquisition who had been leading that pack but . . .he sure as Hell is making the Emperor’s next scheduled and invited

"I mean if the Inquisition chaps have to get it into their beady little minds that we’re bloomin’ heretics needing flogging couldn’t they have bleedin’ well send has to try to go and arrest us and just make a fracking MESS of things," I curse under my breath before turning to the Emperor while at the same time bouncing and rocking the rather upset babe in my arms who’d been sleeping peacefully up until this point.

My efforts only seem to be only moderately successful…

"I rue the day that I ever gave the Inquisition power for now I see it coming back yet again to bite me in the bloody ass!" he hisses, pinching his nose and shaking his head in disgust. "And to top it all off one of these idiots was the very Inquisitor who outwitted the Illuminati and killed my last attempt at reincarnation before now…"

. . .

Oh right! That Sensi business we’d read about in the Warhammer books about . . . Ah, nevermind! Let us just say the Emperor has a bone to pick with some of the more over zealous members of this Inquisition party.

He looks rather put out himself about this latest development. Things had been going so very smoothly up until this point and now this. The next scheduled person and our party crasher were now so engaged with each other in agreement that they had tuned out everything else around them and soon it looked and sounded like they’d be drawing weapons here REALLY soon: this new wayward Primarch and this gaggle of gungho Inquisitors!

I mean it’s nice that Leeman Rus showed up WAY earlier than what the Emperor (and WE) ever expected. Right out of the blue and just HOW he’s shown back up I’m at a loss to explain. The Emperor probably knows (had a knowing smile when Rus’ name got mentioned and my and my sister’s surprised look), but now…

Well, at least Mari is no longer crying in distress. Cannot say the same for Asuka, who’s crying up a storm. Not in fright but rather upset by the look on her face if I don’t miss my guess by what I see . . .

Hm…

"Emperor, with your permission I’d like . . .," I begin to ask a request to perhaps get some people’s attention without bloodshed . . .and having fun in the process.

Yukiko

The Emperor rather liked Rei’s idea more than the option he had been about ready to utilize to return order to these proceedings and thus the stage was set.

"WAAAAAAAH! WAAAAAAAAAAA! WWWAAAAAAA- AAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

So it came to pass that an altercation was halted well before it could begin with the sound of a infant’s wale. A wale, I feel compelled to add, that was magically delivered to the area they stood in via a magical spell with the power of what some would call a "sonic bomb". Rei and my big sisters would say it was more akin to listening to some "heavy metal rockband" on steroids named Moterhead--a band that billed itself as the "loudest" in the business-- at point blank range…

As an aside and at the risk of being pedantic I should point out that Mina Quatermain (formerly Murrey) had been a music teacher of sorts before some altercations with a vampire named Dracula. She had instilled in my sisters (and soon with me) a better appreciation in music and other fine arts, both Western and Eastern. However, while Mother had concentrated on the classics as seen from a Victornian perspective, others in the family I found myself in felt compelled to "round out" our music appreciation with the "other" classics. That ranged from all areas like "techno" to "pop" and up.

Cannot say I appreciate "heavy metal" but would eventually appreciate the efforts that Uncle Elrondir made in the later category for it IS said that "Man does not live by bread alone" as it were; gives a better and more rounded person in the whole. Besides, it showed that he cared!

. . .

However, at the time I had been left asking who Motorhead was when Rei made mention of it the first time around and . . .that is hardly relevant to the task at hand.

Still, as for the task at hand I guess the reason why we have been basically ignored up until this point which makes it understandable, if not exactly forgivable. See, I am given to understand we are "out of context problems" to the arguing parties. So much out of context are we and so far beyond the pale that they just do NOT know who we are, I figure out later. In the meantime it’s rather insulting.

Oh, if you must ask before we continue: an Out-Of-Context Problem is one that is so wildly bizarre and alien that effective countermeasures are effectively inconceivable (at least at the time). And, as it happens, Out-Of-Context problems quite often pose existential threats to a society. The Emperor by far more than us but still…

I can see how they fail to acknowledge the Emperor of Mankind for after all up until a small while ago his physical body had been a shattered corpse, held to a barely living existence through the Golden Throne; hardly something that the Emperor is now, being hale and whole. Best way one could expect contact from him was through confusing prophetic dreams or the decidedly quirky means of him communicating his wishes through some kind of device called the Emperor’s Tarrot, something that is just too vague to give out too clear messages. Too prone to misinterpretation, the Emperor had complained bitterly about before we’d even started this evolution. And the changes that the now living and breathing Emperor shall bring to the Imperium (the long overdue reforms and curbing of the abuses of power some of the powers that be who’d ruled in his name) shall be earth shattering for some. Frightening even but then again having only met this man only briefly before I would wager all on him being able to pull it off! But in any case the Emperor having been dead in all but the most basic sense (and so painful to contemplate for his followers, so beloved he has become) that they’ve ignored his presence, not questioning his validity.

As for myself and my sisters? Well, while we do not appear dangerous the magical charms and jewelry I have been briefed on and their magical might could and would cause a LOT of the Imperium to at least stand back and take notice: at least on a man versus man situation, anyway. As it stands we just look like nothing more than oddly dressed women on a lark… wings or no. The powers that we have at our fingertips (my sisters MUCH more than me) are quiet good at "leveling the game field", or so I am told Perhaps too far from what they are used to from the abilities Psykers have at their beck and call from this "Warp" that Rei secretly shared with me gives her the "willies" (whatever that exactly means) but too close to what they call Witches in the Imperium: rogue Psykers not vetted and approved by Imperium authorities. We might be seen as monsters that threaten the status que.

Thankfully we shall be long gone before that could happen, thank you. Myself, I am rather ambevelant towards this Imperium: do not know enough about it to have much of an opinion. My sisters have a much more negative opinion of the system and (the Emperor being an exception) it’s people and only tolerate it, I learn later, because they are observing, reporting and making initial diplomatic gestures (more on that in a bit) all they see for later; keeping their more negative opinions to themselves and such to better perform their duties. And they were only doing that because of the Emperor himself.

"Trigger triger happy I'm so . . .," I find myself singing to myself under my breath and giggling a little bit, only to force myself back into a more serious frame of mind. "Weird Al Yankovic" is something that Reika only recently introduced to me and I love her dearly more now for it but... Humor later, duty now!

Still, I so do like laughing...

. . .

But that said and by the by…

Needless to say the audible storm drove some of the arguing party to their very knees. Surprising considering the battle prowess they all had I learn later. Then again, our presence had pretty much been dismissed as a non-threat . The Emperor himself had been known for thousands of years to be nothing more than a shattered corpse who’s last vestige of life in a few packet of cells were kept alive on a wondrous contraption called the Golden Throne so of COURSE the living, breathing person in their midst in the clothing of the Emperor had to be an imposter.

That is what they have believed up until this point when they stop in their abortive grab for weaponry to bring to bear upon us as the Emperor himself suddenly starts giving off a rather POWERFUL golden glow that even I can feel, shielded as I am from such things through . . .various means.

"Ah . . .so NICE of you all to finally acknowledge US after our presence having SINGULARLY failed to GRAB you attention, gentlemen!!" Rei smirks, shaking her head slightly and tsks.

"Welcome to the party," the Emperor adds, after glancing briefly at Rei and shaking is head slightly. She might have jumped the gun here in speaking before him, but then again she was expressing nothing that he had not already felt about this mess.

1. So he'll let it slide. Not like we had not helped him (and the Imperium) in a LOT of ways recently.

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