Attacked By Weirdness

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 78457

Without warning, they are attacked by a middle-aged man in a dark grey uniform. He is fit, small, watery-eyed, wild-haired and has a jutting chin. He is very familar.
"Grand Moff Grand Moff!" Fred cries as Astra holds the man down by his face and Velus bites his left ankle.
"Mrrpph!"
"What are you doing here?"
"Mmmrrpp reefff!"
"Oh. Um, Astra?"
"...can't breathe!" cries Grand Moff.
"How do you know this man?" demands Astra.
"He's basically the reason I'm taking this dimensional travel so well without breaking down and crying like a little girl. This man operates a large ship in his world. He was thrown into my kingdom after an extended battle with the Chaos Bringers..."
With that, even Velus paused his ankle-chewing. All who lived knew of the Chaos Bringers...Josh and Scott.
Astra slowly released her grip on the Grand Moff's neck. "This fool does not operate any sailing ship. He does not smell of wood and rope and salty sails. He smells, if anything, of blacksmith forges, axle grease and the metal tubes our two countries share as protection against arrow fire."
"Well." said Fred. "His ship doesn't sail on the seas. It sails in the blackness of the sky."
"Impossible. Have your friend tell us why he attacked or I shall injure him most severely."
Grand Moff explained that his masters had learned of this world and that if he could bring back even the slightest bit of skin from any of the inhabitants, his masters could invade.
Astra put her hand back on the Grand Moff's head. His facial bones creaked as the pressure increased.
"No!" cried Fred. "Astra, please do not kill him. This man has his honor, I saw him personally intervene in a barfight between two trollish monsters and the lowest of his Ensigns. Both men needed medical attention but the man survived because the Grand Moff intervened."
"Not sure I care, Fred..."
"If we kill him, we can't make him tell us about the invasion plans."
With that, Grand Moff was allowed to live. Various whatevers happened and soon the group were in the Allarian capital, meeting with King Emry in several secret levels below the Royal Library.

  1. Grand Moff spills everything.
  2. Despite everything, Grand Moff has loyalty to his superiors. Guess Fred just doesn't know how to pick his friends.
  3. Grand Moff tries to tell his story, but everytime he tries, a red light flashes in his skull and he faints for ten seconds.
  4. A dark figure in a robe, carrying a red glowing sword, kills five guards, injures the king, knocks Fred out and decapitates the Grand Moff (Astra had been in the bathroom).
  5. This option is for Velus fans: Screw inter-dimensional intrigue, Velus is talking with the court wizards about regaining his body before the castle Labradors start looking good.
  6. Literally, in the blink of an eye, Grand Moff is replaced with a sullen, slightly drunk Josh Burbank.

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Lots (edited by Mod - Emry is the king of Allaria not of Aqualaria)

6/28/2008 8:36:27 PM

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