On the Outside Looking INTO one's own soul...

Rei III

I want to know about it so maybe I can make MY final decision here (and perhaps make that wish offered in the best and most beneficial manner), very much indeed!

Being that we are actually stuck between ticks of the clock, time standing still literally, I feel no real rush to speed things along. I want to know and will take time to listen as much as needed.

I also remind her of that, seeing that she seems to have become a bit antsy to return home.

"Well, somehow I feel that maybe there might be some kind of time passing back there even IF time here is frozen," she protests. "I believe that it might be a VERY small passage of time, but still . . ."

"Too long and our mother and father will begin to grow frantic?" I guess.

Rei II

. . . .

Ah, I see. So my sister actually DID imprint upon my parents and vice versa, as it were? Hm. I guess my impressions of what had happened back in the old apartment had been right on the money after all, but I am not totally sure whether or not my folks had actually intended on it happening.

It is strange in some ways that dragons are, great intelligence people with also . . . certain magical characteristics. Throw in the strange business with dopplegangerism and . . . well, I had been told long ago that dragon hatchlings had to be watched over carefully. There had been a danger of them "imprinting" on non-dragons. Maybe when you throw in the mystical nature of the nature of dopplegangers (namely me and my sister), something akin happened here? I have a bond with Alan and Mina, I love them dearly as parents: mother and father. They love me. It is . . . a very agreeable situation that I will not give up. Now, put in to the mix the mystical bonding an analog has like what I have with sister here? It appears that the bond reached out and "nibbled" upon Rei III's heart.

Being that I know my sister, she is starving for warmth. Her world (like mine had been for so long) . . . so cold and lonely. Like a fish taking a fisherman's baited line, she bit into it but it was BARBED . . . barbed.

The union is complete and forever. Just as she is my sister, so is she now daughter to my father and mother. Doesn't mean that it's a given that she shall choose to return with us to Terra Prime (she does have a life here . . . or a potential life here) on this reality/world. Same goes for her choosing to become a Champion: it is not a given. Not a given for the same reasons as why she might not go to Terra Prime. There are analogs of the D'Honaire children who didn't opt to live "happily ever after" upon Terra Prime, you know with the Elder D'Honaires.

. . .

That said and then again, did Sigin also not say that the D'Honaire have similar situations happen every time a new analog of Fred showed up? That a simple question, sort of, was asked between the analog's parents and the new Fred analog, magically. It wasn't an automatic affair like the hate/love reaction analogs/dopplegangers have, but it was a choice. Once chosen, it couldn't be undone. Either the analog Fred forevermore was a son to the parents' hearts, or not. No middle ground.

It is just that . . . this was much QUICKER here with my sister and my parents than . . .

Okay, we'll figure this out later, okay? I'm just saying that now I know that not only will my parents be going insane with worry here about me disappearing into thin air (maybe disintegrated!), but they now will be worried sick about their now daughter as well!

But she won't be swayed and she really DOES deserve it. I know why she wanted to know. It broils down to one word: Shinji.

She wants to know my relationship with mine and MY NERV so she can perhaps use it as a measuring stick for her still nebulous relationship with her issues.

Ah, but the clock is ticking.

Sigh, nothing for it. Talking takes too long so I'll have to do this mentally, ala Inquirer's method: data dumping. Only problem is, I fear that it may be a bit much. Besides the headache and all, I mean. Some of the things I fear I must now show (no longer can dodge it, sister must know for her to decide on whether or not to become a Champion). I'll have to add that MY experiences and impressions do not necessarily mean that they are correct for HER issues, but still it'll be . . . difficult.

Emotionally, I mean for HER. I warn her that that might be the case, but she's still willing, damnit.

As for the physical pain?

"This might hurt a little bit," I say slowly, sighing. "But it'll tell you what you need."

Now, if I remember correctly the method that Inquirer described it as being I do . . . .

Two sets of screams come from above where the Rule is waiting, and suddenly the Celestrial materializes up upon the catwalk next to them, helping them both to their feet after soothing the linger pains they'd been afflicted with.

"I had hoped you would not have opted for that," the Rule sighs. "Pardon the instrusion, but I couldn't help but sense what you'd done. While human minds might be able to duplicate that feat you'd done, the minds of golems are best suited for doing it correctly. Not without a lot more practice, anyway."

"As if I'm going to do something as stupid like that again?" Rei II mutters, only to pause as she looks over at Rei III. The young woman in question is looking down at the still time frozen analog of "her" Commander Akari. She's shaking and clenching her fists in barely controlled fury.

"That . . . bastard!" her sister hisses, looking down in hatred at the man. "He sent me out to DIE, not only once but TWICE!!"

First time being when she, in her first body at the age of ten or so had been tricked by Gendo Akari into saying some things that enraged Dr. Naoko Akagi so badly that she first strangled Rei (her "Rei I" period). The guilt of the murder caused Naoko to commit suicide (and thus paving the way for Gendo Akari's plans to proceed, over her now defunct body).

The second time had been when she had been sent out in Unit OO to be defeated by that one Angel. She hadn't picked up on clues then (and back before as Rei I) about certain things. Clues that said that the Commander knew beforehand what Rei III had been up against, but sent her out ill equipped, hoping for what had happened.

All part of his plans for her, you see. She was nothing more than a tool, to be disposed of and recalled again when needed as needed for . . .his own ends.

She'd missed picking up on the clues before, but with the return of memories, coupled with the insights garnered from what she'd seen from her sister's life . . .now? A faltering love and trust had turned to dust and deep hatred, I fear. And no more lingering allegiances towards NERV commanders tieing her down, the only thing that might still keep her here? Shinji Akari?

"Sister I saw what you discovered about your link to Yui Akari," the younger Rei says softly. "And before you protest saying that it is too soon to conclude that he's my half brother, Yui Akari being the common link, that's not it."

"It was the oddest thing," Rei III says, shaking her head slightly. "Looking outside in at myself through your eyes, sister, but . . . I see the love you have for me is strangely like the love I have for . . . . Shinji. And I was too new to this all to be able to sort it out beforehand. To see that.

1. Okay, confused? Well, here's the straight scoop...

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