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The Never Ending Quest - Episode 2000

As Fred pondered his current situation, he found the ground sinking beneath his feet. "Oh dear," he stated as he felt himself going lower and lower, "quicksand!"

"Um...not exactly," said a disembodied voice, surprising Fred, who would have jumped if he weren't knee deep in the ground.

"Who said that? Show yourself!" demanded Fred.

"Hello, Fred. I am The Programmer, and you have stumbled upon Episode 2000."

"Programmer? Episode? I understand not these terms!" shouted Fred.

"Fred, you live inside a computer...a mechanical calculating machine if you will. You came into being when I wrote a program that would create you, your world, and the resulting situations thereof."

"God?" asked Fred.

"Nah," said The Programmer, "unless your idea of God is a 35 year old man who still lives with his parents, and has never kissed a girl."

"Why have you come to me?" Fred queried.

"Well, you see, I made a mistake. I never expected the epsisodes in your life to go past 1999. As such, the program is unequipped to roll-over to 2000 and the world as you know it is collapsing around it."

"Will I die?" asked Fred in a quivering voice.

"Much much worse," said The Programmer, "you will cease to exist at all!"

"Well then, do something!" shouted Fred.

  1. The Programmer successfully patches the program, and Fred's world is restored.
  2. The Programmer attempts to patch the program, but something goes awry and Fred's finds his world is very changed indeed!
  3. The Programmer decides to wait and see what will really happen to poor Fred.
  4. The Programmer reboots.

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8/31/1999 3:01:25 PM

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