Three-Edged Sword

"What is that supposed to mean, warlock? A sword that is long and enchanted or a sword that has been enchanted for a long time? Or was that supposed to be some kind of pick-up line? Many of you warlocks are said to be sodomites as well."

"I am no sodomite, but you must quest for the meaning in my words, o knight."

"It does not matter. I am certain it will aid me in slaying the dragon. Assuming that it is not a pick-up line. Give it to me!"

"First you have to say the magic word."

Fred bristled. "I do not know any magic words. I am an Allarian knight, by Crom, I fight evil through honest steal, not eldritch nonsense! Now give me the sword, by Radamanthus!"

"Don't be a fool, D'Honaire, you know the magic word. Now say it!"

"No! I shall not deman myself with magic! I am sure that you know it, vile magus, now tell it to me!"

"Hmmmmmmmmmm, alright. Please."

"Please what?"

"That's the magic word."

"Please?"

"Yes."

Fred grimaced, then sighed. "All right. Please give me the sword."

"No."

"WHAT?!" roared Fred. "By Crom, you said you would give me the sword if I said 'please!' Now give it to me now, you bloated stinking sodomitical mouldwarp!"

"You lack it, and need it to kill the Dragon, but I could not give it to you. You must find it for yourself."

"What do you mean by that? What kind of sword is this, anyway?"

"It is a three-edged sword."

Fred's jaw dropped. "Is this some kind of joke? I don't understand!"

"Excactly."

"Is this supposed to be some sort of literary reference, warlock? Because I'll have you know, I am a warrior, not some kind of belles-lettrist!"

"All right, fine. The great bard Straczynski once said that 'Understanding is a three- edged sword.'"

Fred screamed in frustration and clenched his fist. "Never mind. Do you have a weapon I can use to kill the Dragon?"

The wizard answered:

1. "No."
2. "Yes, but I'm certainly not going to give it to you after you've been so impolite."

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