Lord Fred and the Quest for the Oracle of Goth - Not A Scott & Josh Story
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 80044
|
And so it came to pass in the year of our Lord, something or other, that
the brave and noble Fred set out on a new bold and daring
adventure. A quest within a quest, if you will. Yea, verily; a completely
unnecessary mission to consult the Oracle of Goth on a matter of least
import which would most likely be forgotten in the unlikely event he
actually managed to make it to the Oracle’s humble but tastefully
decorated shack in one piece. And Fred said, “Let there be grog.” And
there was Grog. And Fred drank the grog. And it was good. And then for whatever reason we jump back into the present tense. Lord Fred, already thoroughly sloshed, takes in a lungful of the clean mountain air and exhales heartily. “Sancho, my lad, this is going to be a walk in the park,” he says to his faithful squire who somehow failed to be written into the story until now.Sancho, for his part, keeps quiet. He rides upon a mare loaded with enough dried meat and provisions to see himself through for at least a few weeks, after this pompous lout inevitably perishes in one way or another. He’s faithful, yes. But not stupid. “Indeed,” Fred blusters on, “I can’t see how anything could go wrong in any way whatsoever. They will write songs about us, Sancho. Well...about me, mostly, of course. But I'm sure there will be a stanza or two about you. Maybe. They will write songs!” He takes another swig from his bottle and belches. “I think it’s time we take a break. Yes, that seems completely called for. Sancho, be a good man and load my pipe.”“Uh, if I may be so bold, milord,” Sancho ventures. “We’ve only just set out. Literally. We’ve only been on the trail for a little over five minutes…” “Yes, yes,” Fred replies impatiently. “And we’ve made excellent progress! Now do as I say! Load my pipe, refill my bottle, and as for me…well…I need to drain the snake, as it were, in those bushes over there.”Sancho rolls his eyes and pulls his steed to a halt, along with the pack mule. “I give him three days,” he mutters under his breath. Fred’s ears perk up in interest. “Eh? What’s that, Sancho?”“I said ‘I’ll get that right away’,” he hurriedly recovers. “Good man,” Fred beams. “Also, get that ointment ready. You know, for the corns on my feet. Also the one for my bum rash. Gonna need a thorough rub down, if you know what I mean.” He winks, dismounts from his own trusty steed (who has also failed to be written into the story until now), and set off into the woods.And then:
|
Ib (Yes, I know there are two identical options! Sue me!)
10/14/2008 7:37:31 PM
25086781 episodes viewed since 9/30/2002 1:22:06 PM.