Exeunt Shoe God

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 78611

"I said I WANT SOME FUCKING NEWTS!" screams Josh. Before anyone can say or do anything, he pulls out a knife and tackles the Shoe God.

Being a God, he's theoretically more mighty than any mere mortal. But this is the Shoe God, and he's not very mighty at all. Even more importantly, he hasn't had a lot of exercise for the past few millenia, so he's in very bad shape. With very little effort, Jasper takes him down. He stabs him multiple times in the chest and the neck with the knife until the Shoe God stops screaming.

He saws through the Shoe God's neck and cuts his spine free. Cackling in triumph, he gets up, holding the former god's head by the hair.

  1. Sara screams and runs. Jasper chases her with the bloody head.
  2. Jasper asks the head in a loud, slow voice for his bag of newts. That should do the trick.
  3. Sara shrugs indifferently. They make moccasins out of the Shoe God's skin.
  4. Turns out you CAN win a stabbing contest. Let's see how!
  5. The Shoe God's wife, the Boot Goddess, appears and curses them.

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