Loss of Control

And in the midst of this chaos, the worst happens. Lots42 loses control of his bowels.

And by lose control, we mean they decide to leave. "Come back!" yells Lots, calling out after his retreating intestines.

"No!" they call back. The colon adjusts its hat and keeps a resolute grip on the suitcase. "I have had ENOUGH. The late nights...the undercooked steak and the horseradish and the pepper and the eggs and tbe beer! I CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE OF THIS! We're THROUGH!"

"I gave you the world! I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU EVER WANTED! I gave you pizza, and you WANTED the beer! DON'T TRY TO TELL ME IT WASN'T YOUR IDEA!" Lots screams back.

"This relationship is going nowhere, and I'm too old for this! I need stability and committment. I need someone who's in for the long haul, and you're not it." It opens the door and pauses for a moment. "I'll come back for the rest of my stuff tomorrow."

With the finality of an open grave, the door slams shut.

1. Next, Lots' heart sues for damages.
2. The intestines try to pick up the pieces and make a new life for themselves.
3. A truck carrying 20 tons of pot crashes into the house.
4. The colon becomes a secret agent.

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