A Death Worse Than Fate
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 71224
|
Several of the President’s personal bodyguards look as if they are about to
jump you, but the President motions for them to stand down. They
begrudgingly follow their commander-in-chief’s orders. “True, he did donate
blood to those
orphans,” the President concedes. “Then he adopted several of them and sold
them into slavery in Honduras.” You start to protest this, but stop short of commenting. “Damn,” you mutter, mostly to yourself. “I forgot about that.” “I remember when Scott and I first met,” Jerry Seinfeld says, standing to address the throng of mourners. “He was hanging upside down by a shoelace, crying out for help.” This enkindles a few chuckles from the stoic audience. “I was all like ‘What's with these people hanging upside down by their shoes? I mean, who are these people’? Well, I’ll tell who they are – total jerks, if they’re anything like Scott was, that is. When he first moved in to the building I thought maybe he was just some kind of introvert or heroin addict. As it turns out he was neither. He was just another clumsy jerk. And you know what? I’m gonna miss the guy!”That seems to sum up the mood for the moment. Maybe Scott was a jerk. But that makes his passing no less painful. “That was amazingly insightful, Jerry,” the President agrees vocally. “Especially coming from you. Well, the only reason I came out here today is because my many political enemies won’t think to look for me here. I am, after all, facing 67 charges of Presidential misconduct. That being said, I’m glad I came. I think we all owe this man, this Scott, a great deal. Of what? I have no idea. But it sounds good, and that’s all that really matters. Now let’s throw this bum in the ground and go get plastered at the local Pub! We’ll bill it to the American taxpayer!”This seems to lighten the mood considerably, and the sun even seems to peek out, if only briefly, from the thick, gathering mists. You sigh. Seems to be a fitting end for a man who never got much respect in life. As everybody ambles off towards the pub you...
|
Ib
11/16/2007 3:44:43 PM
Extending Enabled
24943590 episodes viewed since 9/30/2002 1:22:06 PM.