Presence of a Brain

"YEOW!" Scott shrieks in pain, but fortunately, there's too much happening in the tea house with sunken floors, so his outburst goes unnoticed. "Josh, you prick, what the hell was that for?!"
"You're being a movie elitist, that's why," replies Josh, as he casually decapitates a Yazuka member with his sword.
"I am not! Just because I worked in a Blockbuster in high school for a year--"
"I remember that, Scott. We did go to the same school together! Hell, my family rented movies when you were working the counter. I don't know how you balanced your job with school and being a star basketball player! [72660]"
"Yeah, but Josh, did you have to stab me in the ass?"
"It could've been worse, y'know."
"Oh, spare me! How the hell could it have been worse?"
"I could've done this!"

Josh drops his sword and smacks Scott's ass as hard as he can. "Yeowch!" Scott screams, leaping up in pain. Again, his cries go largely unnoticed. The Bride continues her rampage, seemingly oblivious to Josh and Scott being in the same room. Several more Yazuka henchmen have been mortally wounded.

"Why do you keep abusing me like this, Josh?" Scott asks, gingerly picking up the swords he dropped.
"Again," Josh replies. "You are a movie elitist. I bet you have every Criterion Collection release at home, too! Snob!"
"Dammit, Josh, that hurts!"
"Well, do you want me to kiss it and make it all better then, you big baby?!"
"Josh, I don't swing that way."
"Yes, Scott, I'm well aware of all of the women you've slept with in the past eleven years [69968]. No need to brag about it like you always do. I bet you wanna shag The Bride over there, too!"
"Forget it! Let's just get these guys out of here, okay?"
"Are you sure about that?" Josh asks, examining Scott's wound. "You seem to be bleeding pretty heavily here."

1. Josh and Scott leap into action.
2. Scott bleeds to death.
3. Scott panics after Josh "kisses it to make it all better".
4. The Bride kills both Scott and Josh.
5. Josh and Scott kill everyone in the room, including, by accident, The Bride.

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