The Library of Unholy Scriptures - A Wholly Unholy Place Indeed
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 57369
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Not since the days when the Faceless Messiah of the Vortex (the FMV,
or ‘Hank’ as he liked to be called during more informal occasions) had
roamed the countryside, spreading terror and wanton destruction of goods
and private property (after he had devoured the Stillborn Seraphim who
was kept in the Sarcophagus of Sacred Sorrows on Third Street (the SSSSS
on TS)), had any carnal woman or mere mortal DARED to set foot
into the Library of Unholy Scriptures. Indeed, Lady Andrea knew very well that the library was not just any regular old oubliette or chamber that was to be found throughout the castle. No, sir. You better recognize. This is how it be in this hood: the library was actually the oldest room in the entire castle. Even before the first stones of the enormous ramparts had even been quarried far away on the Mountain of Sardonic Loons, the library had stood exactly where it was. Over the ages the castle had been incorporated into it, not the other way around. Soon enough, after a slight mishap with a stag’s head that wouldn’t shut up (which ended in violence and several broken dishes), Andrea found herself standing outside the enormous metallic doors that led to the Library, a stoic visage on the soft, angelic features of her face.So why haven’t any mortals been here in so long? You might be asking yourself. Andrea nods. “That’s a good question.”Quiet, Andrea. I wasn’t talking to you. Anyway, the reason why no foolish mortals have DARED set a foot into this most Unholy of Places is because... “There’s a big scary monster who guards the manuscripts within?” Andrea ventures.Stop interrupting me. It’s very rude. Anyway, the reason why no MERE MORTAL has DARED to set a foot within the Library is... Andrea blushes “Sorry. I won’t interrupt again. I’m just feeling a bit..jumpy.”DAMMIT! I said SHUT UP, you vile woman! I’m trying to explain something to the gentle readers, you witch! Andrea is affronted, and her the veins in her neck begin to bulge and her muscles spasm in a very un-ladylike fashion. “How...how...DARE YOU CALL ME A WITCH!”Look at you. All sweaty. Look at how it glistens on your taut, twitching muscles. Disgusting. You are the very essence of all that is evil and wrong with womankind.
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ChubbyT!
3/9/2006 8:46:05 AM
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