Enter, the Kumquat
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 44944
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“Rarr,” the Kumquat said in all of it’s glorious Kumquatiness. “Behold -
it is I; the Kumquat Monster. Be afraid, for I am to scare you.”
“Well aren’t you just adorable,” cooed the fairy fromerly known as Fred. “I’ve never seen anything so cute in my entire life! Look at him, guys! Isn’t he just the cutest!?” “Well, at least he smells better than the majority of this hellhole’s inhabitants,” muttered Alura under her breath.“He is rather cute,” Astra agreed. “Kumquat,” repeated Velus. “What a funny word. It sounds like some kind of squash.”And then, silence. “Rarr...”Astra rolled her eyes. “Okay, you already said that.” The Kumquat lowered it’s head in shame. “That’s all I got...”Fred ran over to the monster and embraced him. “It’s okay, guy. We’re all terribly afraid.” He turned to the others. “ Aren’t we?” Silence.“See? They can’t even speak.” “Actually...” Alura cut in.“Don’t pay attention to that bitch,” Fred interrupted. “No one else does. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Oberon, High King of the Fairies and Protector of the Pixies. I also serve as an ambassador to the smurfs.” “My name’s Mervyn,” the monster revealed shamefully, lowering his head even lower in his shameful shame.Everyone errupted into a fit of hysterical laughter. I mean, c’mon, his name was Mervyn. Who names their kid Mervyn? Go ahead, laugh. It’s funny. Laugh at Mervyn the Kumquat. DO IT! “Let’s point at him while we laugh,” Alura suggested. And they did. They pointed and laughed. And who can blame them?
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Lost Soldier
8/26/2004 1:37:51 PM
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