Bethany and Karen Fight While Fred Lies Semiconscious on a Bench
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 28509
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Fred woozily rolled around for a while, oblivious to the fight above him.
Bethany had whacked him rather hard, and he had been stepped on at least
twice so far
by high heels. Eventually he rolled away and made it over to the other
bench.
One who hadn't been so oblivious was Justin, who, despite being Fred's boss, was still one of those lower-echelon sorts that ate lunch on the roof. He had given up trying to draw a map of the entire building so that other mailboys who were much less intelligent than Fred could find their way around, but found it was a frustrating job. Accordingly, he went up to the roof, expecting to drown his frustration in a large bottle of beer and a ham sandwich. What he did not expect was to see two beautiful women battling it out for what appeared to be the love of Fred. Although jealous of Fred, Justin decided this was an opportunity he couldn't pass out, and ate his ham sandwich while intently watching Bethany and Karen scratch and claw at each other. Soon, other lower-echelon sorts from outside the mailroom began to climb up to the roof. They, too, began crowding around the periphery of the roof, watching the catfight which had slowly moved away from the bench and toward the center of the rooftop area. Men weren't the only ones up there, though. Karen's secretary Tina was collecting bets on the outcome of the fight, and, though most of the men who bet didn't have all that much to bet with, it still looked like Tina would make a hefty sum. Other women found this the perfect time to gossip over near one of the trees, checking out some of the guys they found to be attractive. They looked at Fred quite intently but when word spread that Fred was the reason for the fight they looked elsewhere. After the 75-minute lunch break ended, most of the upper-level executives had noticed that their lower-level employees had not come back from lunch yet, and went up to the roof to investigate. As more and more people crowded onto the roof, the space Karen and Bethany had to fight in was smaller and smaller. And then it started to rain, and there was much rejoicing from the mostly male crowd. Already Karen had managed to wrest Bethany's purse away from her and flung it under the bench Fred was lying woozily on. Both had taken off their high heels after stepping on Fred a couple of times, Bethany had taken off her dress to allow for greater freedom of movement, and most of Karen's clothes had large rips in them, allowing views Karen would normally not have let anyone have. Eventually, the president noticed that no work was getting done. After inquiring around, one of the few people left told him that she had seen a bunch of people flock to the stairs, yelling anxiously about getting to the roof. "KAREN JONES! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?" Karen looked over to see her father angrily standing in the doorway. "I...I don't know." Tina frantically ran over to give money to those who had wagered on "President Jones will break up the fight before either wins," which happened to be exactly two people. Bethany, still angry over everything that had started the catfight, yelled, "She was seducing my man, and I couldn't let her get away with it!" "Karen," her father began, "you can't live life trying to sleep around with every man you can or can't get your hands on. Eventually, you're going to have to grow up. Now Bethany, where is your man, so that I can keep him away from my daughter?" Bethany pointed to Fred, who was just beginning to recover from the purse to the ear. "It's Fred Donner, the mailroom guy; I don't know why, but he's looking a lot hunkier today than he ever did before. He asked me out and I said yes in a fit of passion. Then Karen decided to steal him away from me before I even got to know him." After a couple of weeks, Fred and Bethany were still happily together, mainly because the berries were still powerful, but also because Bethany had seen other sides of Fred she would have never considered looking at before. Bethany conceded to Karen and let Karen have Fred to herself every Monday in exchange for the position of head receptionist. Most impressively, though, at the monthly meeting, it was discovered that office morale and productivity was higher than it had ever been. Fred, who had been promoted to Assistant Vice President (where he collected information, packaged it, investigated inconsistencies in it, and sent it in a nice neat package to President Jones), suggested that the catfight was the result of it and proposed to have similar events throughout the quarter to maintain current levels of morale and productivity.
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unknown adventurer
10/18/2004 5:30:56 PM
Extending Enabled
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