Princess Bambi!?

"Of course," Lots says smoothly. "Now the one thing our viewers really want to know, Princess - and I have dozens of their emails here to prove it - is why you spend most of the time naked."

"Well, Lots, the explanation is very simple. When I agreed to become Honorary President of a naturist organisation, namely the Aqualarian Society for Throwing Raiment Away, I decided that I should take the job seriously. I even changed my name."

"And what was your name before?" Sir Josh wants to know.

"I'd rather not say."

"Isn't it true that your name was originally Mabel, and that the main reason for your changing your name was that nobody would take a warrior princess called Mabel seriously?"

"No! My name was not Mabel!"

"Then what was it?"

Too late, Astra realises that it might have been better not to have contradicted Sir Josh. Compelled by the magic power of television, which makes people reveal things that they would much rather keep to themselves, she says very quietly: "Bambi."

1. The audience erupts in laughter.

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