To Die Like A Hero

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 17083

The giant conglomeration of rock rose up from the canyon floor and lumbered after them. Each step sounded like an avalanche and each limb moved with the power of an earthquake. Although slow at first it quickly began to pick up speed and it was clear that our two heroes could not, in the long run, outrun it.

But Astra, in her small, sleek, demifox form, could definitely outrun Fred.

So Fred did the only thing he could do, he stopped running (actually, he stopped jerkily loping -slash- stumbling about like an arthritic senior citizen on amphetamines), turned around, and faced the hulking, granite-like monster. If he had to die, he thought, at least he would die like a man. He would die like a knight. He would die like a HERO.

Astra turned back to look as she continued to run away and nearly stumbled at what she saw. 'What is that stupid git doing?!'

"Fear not, Princess Astra!" Fred shouted out as the huge, stone-skinned creature rushed up to him, "Your safety is assured, for I shall sacrifice my life so that you may live!"

"WHAT?!" Astra cried out and stared at Fred.

"It is clear that only one of us will survive this dusty monster's attack!" Fred hollered, striking a defiant pose with his wooden cane. "But I fear not my death if it means that you shall escape to safer ground. So run away, loyal Astra! Run Away!"

While Astra appreciated not having to die at the hands of an extremely large rock monster and recognized that Fred's death would give her the time she needed to put necessary distance between it and her, she couldn't help but feel a bit irked by the tone in Fred's voice. "Are you suggesting that I'm afraid or something? Are you calling me a coward?" she asked with a shrill voice.

"Well I'm not the one running away," Fred mumbled to himself as he prepared to meet the crushing onslaught of the craggy, mountain-like rock golem.

"I can die just as heroically as you can," Astra shouted indignantly as she ran back to him. "You - you man!" she added petulantly.

And so it was that our two heroes now stood side-by-side, ready to face their deaths at the hands of a giant, hulking, craggy, granite-like, stone-skinned, mountainous rock golem. But just before the towering monstrosity reached them a large brown cow fell from the sky and hit the rock golem on the head. The rock golem was stunned by the impact and fell to the ground where it lay sprawled in a jumble of rock, stone and little pebbles.

Fred and Astra gaped at what they had just witnessed. And then Fred turned to Astra and asked, "Your goddess Nava wouldn't happen to be the goddess of cows would she?" Astra shook her head, "No, that would be the goddess Leche." But what happened next made them gape even more gapefully then they had gaped before, for out of the sky came another object but this object did not fall with the grace and speed of an uncontrolled projectile but fluttered down with the aim and precision of a bird of flight. But it wasn't no bird.

The thing landed just a few feet from Fred and Astra and stared dolefully at the now deceased cow. "So," Fred whispered to Astra, "is that Pegasus?" Astra turned to Fred with irritation and asked, "Does that look like a horse to you?" Fred shrugged, "Well, yeah, sort of. Except for the stripes." Astra found his response astonishing. "Haven't you ever heard of zebras, Fred?" Before Fred could reply, the zebra (actually it was a winged Zebra which isn't the same thing as a zebra at all) turned its head to them and said, "I'm not a zebra. I'm a Meclandir."

And then the rock golem began to stir. In moments it would rise, ready to menace them once again. "Well, gotta go," the Meclandir said and flapped its wings.

  1. Fred and Astra jump on the Meclandir's back (which doesn't make the Meclandir happy at all)
  2. Fred starts to thwack the rock golem with his cane
  3. A second brown cow falls from the sky

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WolfRun

9/2/2001 2:07:56 PM

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