Last Song Requests....

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 16275

Now, to understand what this is all about.....a bit of review is in order here.

In some worlds the land of Krynn (which falls under the "Dragonlance" is an Advanced Dungeons and Dragons setting where the forces of good fight against the vile forces of evil. It has quiet the following, even with objections made by some fans to certain changes in it. It is of a genre that those like Mary Gentle parodied in her her book "Grunts" (which is great fun, and recommended if you haven't read it). As far as the Dragonlance books go, some have read them, and found them pretty enjoyable, in a turn-your-brain-off-and-just-enjoy-the-story kind of way.

As for a an in depth review of the general races and timeline analysis of this world, these two URLs are recommended:

http://www.edu.physics.uch.gr/~lookas/races.html
http://www.edu.physics.uch.gr/~lookas/timeline.html

What are draconians in general?

Well.....the information comes directly from here:

http://www.dragonlance.com/reference/races/races.cfm?SecID=9<P >

The Races of Krynn: Draconians

Draconians are the human-sized corruptions of good dragon eggs. By using captured good dragon eggs shortly before the War of the Lance, Wyrllish the cleric, Dracart the mage and the ancient red dragon Harkiel developed the process for corrupting the eggs into draconians. Though there is some debate, and consequently some conflicting information on the subject, it is generally agreed that draconians can't reproduce. (There are reports, however, of female draconians.)

Draconians were the crack troops of the Dragon Highlords. Because of their connection to the dragons, draconians are immune to dragonfear and seem to worship the evil dragons. Draconians are more likely to follow orders than the typical ogre or goblin (or mercenary, for that matter), some types can use magic&#8212;clerical and magic-user spells, and when they are killed each draconian has a special attack that is carried out at the end of their life. Draconians are immune to human diseases and live to be 1,000 years old.

The five types of draconians are as follows: Baaz, Kapaks, Sivaks, Bozaks and Auraks.

The Aurak draconians are the only draconians without wings, and the Sivaks are the only ones who can truly fly.

Baaz

These draconians are the smallest of their brethren, and are used as common ground troops. They are of chaotic alignment for the most part, and as a result are interested in getting what is best for them individually. Baaz wear disguise often, concealing their wings and scales underneath large hoods and masks when traveling through non-draconian lands. When a Baaz is killed, its body turns to stone and then to dust, but remains in solid form long enough to trap whatever weapon killed it within its stony remains.

Kapak

Kapak draconians are generally the assassins of the group; they use their venomous saliva to coat their weapons, which makes them perfect as assassins. Like their copper dragon parents, Kapaks lure their targets into traps and use any way they possibly can to gain an advantage. When killed, a Kapak dissolves into a mass of poison.

Sivak

These silver draconians are the only ones who are able to truly fly (the others may be able to glide, but not fly). These draconians are second only to the Auraks in power. They generally attack with huge two-handed swords, as well as their claws and armored tail. In addition to flight, Sivaks have a unique (but limited) ability to shape-shift. When a Sivak kills a humanoid-size or smaller creature, it may polymorph into the shape of the victim. Once it shifts back to its regular shape, however, the ability to take the shape of the victim is lost&#8212;until, of course, they kill again. A Sivak will also assume the form of someone who has slain it: the "death shape" will last for three days, after which the body will decompose into black soot.

Bozak

Bozaks are perhaps the most magical of the bunch, with the exception of their "enchanted" Aurak cousins. Created from the eggs of gold dragons, the Bozaks are able to cast spells like a 4th-level magic-user. Bozaks are cruel warriors, only sparing a life when it is to their benefit. Bozaks explode when killed, injuring those unfortunate enough to be near it.

Aurak

The Aurak draconians are the special agents of the Dragon Highlords because of their intelligence, cunning and magical abilities. Auraks appear to be 7 feet tall, with thin limbs and no wings. Auraks have the ability to cast Dimension Door three times a day. They also have to ability to exert some mind control over their victims. When fighting Auraks, they must effectively be killed twice. The first time their hit points are depleted, the Aurak goes berserk and attacks when melee attacks only, forgetting their magic spells. When slain, the Aurak becomes "enchanted" and immolates itself and those around it, though it is immune to harm. After several rounds, the Aurak explodes, injuring anything near it.

Since draconians are unable to reproduce, they have dwindled in numbers since the War of the Lance. At this time, draconians have taken up the nation of Tyr as their home, and spend much of their time in an intoxicated state. It is rumored that a group of draconians, in an act of altruism, have managed to produce female draconains from other ancient dragon eggs. (Thanks to Kaia Harris for the information.)

As it happens, the rumors of female draconians are very true....and one Scott Chen stumbled right across them....

Now, the story of these particular draconians, their place in things is kind of told in episode 16202.

Scott sits himself down on a convenient boulder, and starts to tell what he remembers of the cause of Kang's distress. Admittedly, this is second handed information he got from a fan of Dragonlance, but......

"Kang, you and your humaniod reptiles.....The mutated products of Takhisis' warping of your bodies of the Metallic dragons' eggs." Scott stops, clears his throat. "Jeeze, I sound like a stupid bard! I mean to say that what is going on is really simpl

e. All the gods and goddess of Krynn have just evacuated Krynn space." This brings gasps and muttering from the Draconian until Kang shouts his men back into silence and gesture for Scott to continue.

"Kang, you know what the female Knight of Vision or whatever of Takhisis told you? How she said that there was a war in the heaven, and that the Krynn dieties were losing?" Scott asked.

Kang nodded mutely.

"Well, the final battle went something like this, from what I've....heard from others who've read that history from that annoying neutral historian that somehow knows everything of interest on Krynn. What happened was that dwarven god Reorx, the SOB who was responsible for bringing Chaos to Krynn by accident, was trying to get a drop of blood from that Elder god to bring him under control. Well, Reorx turned.....yellow. He was frightened shitless by Chaos. Chaos was a powerful being that could kill him, so he didn't want to risk his life for his follower.....for the world of Krynn. Tasslehof Burrfoot, a Kender for crying out loud, was the one who saved the day. He was able to dodge Choas' attacks long enough to wound him with his trusty weapon--Rabbit Slayer--and get a DROP of blood from Chaos. Reorx, damn him, was at least able to use that blood to.....bring this battle to a draw."

Kang and his draconians were hanging on every word that Scott was saying.

"What it boiled down to is this." Scott continued. "Choas would leave Krynn alone. He wouldn't touch it....in exchange for the gods and goddess from Krynn had to leave, never to return. Choas will kill ANY Krynn diety that tries to return....and/or ANY diety less powerful than Choas who tries to set up shop on Krynn. Basically, folks, we are on our own here!"

"But...but that means that all the magic would leave, also!" Slith sputters.

"Not.....really, Slith." Scott qualified. "One god or another was in control of the various shades of magic of Krynn. With their loss, Krynn's citizens need to relearn how to tap a more primal level of magic. Now, if I remember what will happen...."

"Will happen?!" Kang interrupts. "What? Are you saying you are from the future?"

"No, Commander Kang, I am not!" Scott denied strongly. "I am, however, NOT from this world. I'm from a planet called Earth. I do have a REAL good idea what'll happen next, considering the power vacuum that the absence of the Krynn gods. And let me assure you that you are NOT going to like what that idea is!"

"I'm sure as hell NOT liking this discussion already!" Kang muttered. "But it makes too much sense to deny what you are saying, human."

"The name is Scott, Commander." Scott said respectfully. Junior whined, and Scott absently scratched Junior behind his ear. Junior made a sound of pleasure and snuggled up to a befuddled Scott. He shrugs and then continues.

"Now, the next most powerful beings on Krynn are the dragons." Scott said. "With the gods not keeping them in check, they will do several things. First, I remember something about dragons growing....much larger and more powerful than they already are. Also, they are some of the first beings to relearn how to use magic. They will make a grab for power....the good.....the bad.....the neutral."

"Oh shit." Kang says quietly.

"'Oh shit.' about covers it." Scott agrees. "You know the only reason why the monochromatic dragons worked with you and didn't kill you out of general principal was because the Dark Queen said to. She's not here, now. At best, you draconians would be used as cannon fodder. I remember reading about how you dodged getting put up as shock troopers by getting your minotaur commander smashed on apple cider and shooting him from a ballista into battle. Nice touch. I remember how you...left that last human commander because.....he wasn't utilizing you as engineer....as agreed apon. That human wanted you as cannon fodder and ditch digger....."

Kang and company growl at the memory. Scott nods, expecting that.

"As for any metallic dragons.....Well, you KNOW what they'll try." Scott reasoned aloud. "Kill you on sight, or maybe try and convert you back.....to metallic dragons!"

"We like being what we are, thank you very f*^king much!" Kang and company shout.

Scott waites for the angry shouts to pass, then.......

"Well, that is just great!" Kang says angrily. "If, this is true!"

"I'll be vindicated when you draconians look up into the night sky and only see ONE moon, instead of the usual THREE!" Scott rejoined angrily. "That and the fact that nothing.....not spell.....not magic item below Relic status WORKS! Either I'm right, or your Dark Queen has gotten angry at you....taken away your magic. Not bloody likely, considering. She'd shown her anger by killing the....female draconians most likely."

Slith give a quick glance at the chirping females, and back at Scott.

"This Scott....does make a strong arguement, Commander." Scott hears Slith say quietely to Kang. Kang looks at Scott, and nods in agreement.

"So, Scott, what....would YOU suggest I do, if you were in my place." Kang says quietely. "Let us just find out, for a laugh.... or more."

What now?

Well, the next thing we see is that the Dark Queen had, as a last act of spite, had stashed away some very modern 20th century weaponry from various Earths for Kang's group to find and to use....to wreck havoc across the land, apparently.

Problem is that Kang and his draconian followers are....different from the stereotypical monsters of Krynn bard song. They'd grown tired of destroying and killing...and wanted to build and create a niche in this world for themselves....to live as a civilized race, perhaps. That said, one could perhaps say that they weren't....evil any more? Scott thought so and so decided to lend aid to them. He believed in Kang's group so much that he even risked his life in defending the last and only chance that the draconians had at continuing on in this world.

Kang and the other, hearing the sound of battle rush in and find Scott dying on the floor, and a trail of blood leading away. Seeing what happened...and what could have happened, there isn't much kang and the others can do to help Scott. Dying, however, Scott gets kang to promise him to think about what they'd talked about....what the evil dragons had in store for them and what role draconians could actually play in this new world.

If nothing else, to spite those who'd have killed his reace's future....Kang silenetly vows to keep a promise to a dying man....

So, later on that same day, as per request by Scott for the music he'd like to have played at his uneral....Krynn is treated to some very strange songs indeed!

Back at the landing zone with Roland and friends...

"Tiamat's blood!" Dragon Synizn mutters as strange, eldritch sounds that could be called music bounce off the hills, "What is that noise?!"

Karma police arrest this man He talks in maths, he buzzes like a fridge He's like a detuned radio Karma police arrest this girl Her hitler hairdo is makin me feel ill And we have crashed her party This is what you get This is what you get This is what you get when you mess with us Karma police I've given all i can It's not enough I've given all I can But we're still on the payroll This is what you get This is what you get This is what you get when you mess with us For a minute there I lost myself I lost myself For a minute there I lost myself I lost myself For a minute there I lost myself I lost myself For a minute there I lost myself I lost myself

"Think it's some song from Radiohead?" Eddie Dean mutters, recognizing the voice of one of the singers even though this particular song had been written after he'd been abducted by Roland to Midworld.....

  1. He'd preferred Metallica's brand of music, himself, really....to that.....

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6/27/2001 4:59:59 AM

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