Dinner On a Hill

"Lovely afternoon, isn't it?" Fred commented.

"Oh, jus' fa-bulous." the Dragon said, ravenously tearing the cow to pieces.

"I must say, friend, it shows you've been watching your weight!"

"Wha thank yo'. An' I mus' say, these cows yo' humans keep is jus' stu- pendous! Sho' could go for another."

"What say you to a dark burgundy apres diner?" Fred grinned, taking a sip of tea.

"Mah mah!"

But then Fred sighed and set his cup aside. "Dragon, ol' chap, do you ever get lonely? I mean, like, for a wife and family?"

"No." the Dragon said, and kept crunching through the cow's ribcage. "Wh- ell... sometimes."

"My problem is, my job as a gigolo pays well, and I'm quite popular. But none of the ladies I'm with really respects me for me, you know what I'm saying? It's all 'Fred rub my back' or 'Fred take me now'. Gets sickening after a while."

"Preachin' to the choir, guvnuh."

"Well, that's it!" Fred said, standing up. "I'm gonna go out there and find my soul mate! Nothing's gonna stop me!"

The Dragon seemed genuinely touched. "Suh, I say suh, that's a real good idea! Then I'll come alon' with yo. Perhap I'll find me a nice bitch too!"

Without even finishing their dinner, Fred climbed onto the Dragon's back and they took off. But where would they go to find a suitable mate for Fred and the Dragon?

1. The Dark Castle of Draconia the Merciless, who had a tendency to kidnap human girls and chain them naked to walls. "Mah type o' woman!" said the Dragon.
2. The Chromatic Swamps, where a race of fair-skinned amazons had trained dragons to do their bidding. "Ah sho' love submissive gals!" said the Dragon.
3. The mystical land of Podgoria, where it was said a race of human-like nymphs dwelled who had the power to change into dragons. "Kinky! But where is it?" said the Dragon.

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