Earlameyer the Butt Pirate

As the rats who had abandoned the pirate ship reached the shore, Alura would explain how she knew about the legend of Greenbeard and his exploits. Greenbeard always commanded very distinctive watercraft, which was always designed to look significantly different than any other boat on the high seas. Alura had, in her solo adventures, encountered Greenbeard on several occasions. You could say they were practically on a first name basis with one another.

Greenbeard and his men, a crew of twelve other pirates, all expertly swam away from the destroyed flagship. What had happened earlier, during Alura's reconciliation with Lord Fred, her sister Astra, and Velus, a freak large wave had struck Greenbeard's ship, while it was still out of the environment. It could be argued that it was a complete void out there, containing nothing but sea water, and birds, and fish. And several tons of plundered treasures aboard the ship now lost to the waters. Also, the part of the ship that the front fell off. But nothing else, especially 20,000 tons of crude oil.

Fred and company stand closer together as Greenbeard and his men swim from one environment to another environment...

* Sam Fritz, first mate.
* Unlucky Pete, second mate, and who before today, had never experienced any sort of life altering misfortune in his whole sodding life.
* Wishbone Nash, navigator.
* David Earl Frederick, cook.
* John Kenneth Lloyd, jack-of-all-trades.
* Randolph Sherman Thomas, maintenance.
* Captain Scabbard, lead attacker on raids and an excellent swordsman.
* U.L. Washington, second attacker, secretary and surveyor. "U.L." is his legal name, the letters don't stand for anything.
* Norton Billingsley, another jack-of-all-trades, and responsible for cataloging the plundered loot aboard. He may be a distant relative to Robert Billingsley, another acquaintance of Lord Fred and the others.
* Bobbie Rae Fischer, transgender crew member and probably the most skilled crew member of all.
* Ian Brandon Anderson, stowaway/captive who does nothing to endear himself to the others.

* A shot didn't ring out.
* A door didn't slam shut.
* The maid did not scream (but a couple of people on Greenbeard's ship sure did!)
* Millions of starving people did not organize a revolution to dispose of the King who lived in luxury.
* A small boy did not grow up overnight on a Kansas farm.
* It failed to snow.
* A little girl wearing a tattered shawl succeeded in selling someone flowers for once.
* The young intern at City Hospital did not make an important discovery.
* The mysterious patient in Room 213 did not awaken.
* The patient was not the sister of the young boy in Kansas, who coincidentally, did not love the girl in the tattered shawl, who just happened to be the daughter of the maid who managed to escape the pirates.
* Forty thousand heads of cattle did not stampede through a small camp. Which wouldn't have mattered a bit, because the ranch foreman had fallen asleep on the job again.
* Two men who worked at the camp did not get into a vicious fight.
* The ranch was not saved.

1. "Halt! Identify yourselves!" Lord Fred commands.
2. Alura and Astra quickly devise a plan to take the crew captive.
3. Velus asks Greenbeard what materials his ship was built from.
4. Suddenly, the front of the ship, which as you know fell off, washes ashore.
5. The young intern from City Hospital appears on the beach.
6. Greenbeard's first question is asking if anyone has seen the daughter of the maid that had gotten away from them.
7. Can you book me a cab?
8. A large wave hits the island.

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