Hey, there'snothing wrong with your episode and I've no intention of bypassing it. The loss of momentum is my fault. As stories develop and grow more complex, new episodes generally become harder to write, I find, but I'm sorry to have taken so long this time.
Thnaks for the insights into what you had in mind.
Episode 85321
Moderator: Extend-A-Story Moderators
-
Hi! My name is Ib!
- Posts: 193
- Joined: Fri Nov 09, 2007 4:38 am
Yes, I must apologize as well, Xavier. I've enjoyed all of your additions to this thread.
I sort of had the same intent with my recent episode, to tie up some loose ends. It had been in the back of my mind for awhile, Exotica's encounter with Minestus, that is. And more importantly, what his motivations were.
It seems the thing that undid Minestus was his own over confidence. Even with the ring, Elaine could have been easily destroyed. Instead, he seems to have been like a cat playing with it's prey.
He seemed bored. So, I figured it was a purely out of boredom that he snatched up Exotica. Ect. ect.
But again, I don't think there was ANYTHING wrong with your recent episode.
"If you choose this path, know that even if you return victorious, there will be severe consequences. If you leave Themyscira, you will lose your claim on the throne. The crown will pass to Maia"
That's the only part that struck me as somewhat odd. But, it's a moot point anyway.
I sort of had the same intent with my recent episode, to tie up some loose ends. It had been in the back of my mind for awhile, Exotica's encounter with Minestus, that is. And more importantly, what his motivations were.
It seems the thing that undid Minestus was his own over confidence. Even with the ring, Elaine could have been easily destroyed. Instead, he seems to have been like a cat playing with it's prey.
He seemed bored. So, I figured it was a purely out of boredom that he snatched up Exotica. Ect. ect.
But again, I don't think there was ANYTHING wrong with your recent episode.
"If you choose this path, know that even if you return victorious, there will be severe consequences. If you leave Themyscira, you will lose your claim on the throne. The crown will pass to Maia"
That's the only part that struck me as somewhat odd. But, it's a moot point anyway.
At the minute I think that all we really need is a new nemesis, some impending danger or foe that all the forces of good can rally against. With Minestus gone, the main crux of the initial plot - slaying the dragon - has been completed, which means that we're in danger of sailing without a compass, or some other more appropriate analogy.
This is mainly the reason why I keep dragging the storyline kicking and screaming back to the machine. I figure that the dragons' attack on Telluria has everything to do with the Nexus. It's also why I kind of jumped on Anableps' Conscience character and made her/it evil, to maintain a sense of ALL IS NOT WELL BWA HA HA. Ha.
My introduction of Euaristus, Heraclius and.......thingy (his name's not thingy) to the storyline was so we had characters that would fully appreciate the all-consuming badness of the Nexus. I figure that Euaristus and the others were initially drawn to the Shreken by the death of Minestus, but now have got bigger fish to fry.
Right, I'm done figuring.
P.S. Everyone stop apologising. That's my job. Sorry sorry sorry. Xavier, every time I read one of your episodes in this thread there's always one bit where I go "Yes, yes, that's exactly what I'm thinking!"
This is mainly the reason why I keep dragging the storyline kicking and screaming back to the machine. I figure that the dragons' attack on Telluria has everything to do with the Nexus. It's also why I kind of jumped on Anableps' Conscience character and made her/it evil, to maintain a sense of ALL IS NOT WELL BWA HA HA. Ha.
My introduction of Euaristus, Heraclius and.......thingy (his name's not thingy) to the storyline was so we had characters that would fully appreciate the all-consuming badness of the Nexus. I figure that Euaristus and the others were initially drawn to the Shreken by the death of Minestus, but now have got bigger fish to fry.
Right, I'm done figuring.
P.S. Everyone stop apologising. That's my job. Sorry sorry sorry. Xavier, every time I read one of your episodes in this thread there's always one bit where I go "Yes, yes, that's exactly what I'm thinking!"
I think that it was a good episode. It answers some questions, and raises others, and fixed the fact that I forgot that there was snow on the mountain peak. I tweaked 85651. I am not sure that the name of the Nexus was mentioned in the conversation on the mountain peak previously, and Astra and Elaine would probably not have knowledge of the name. (Heraclius has stated the name to Adele, but Astra and Elaine are not aware of this.) I had Elaine mention the name in an early draft of this episode, but edited it out when I realized that only Euaristis would know the name of the machine. JH may have been going from that version. The tweak now has Euaristis mention the name in passing.
Glad you like it. And thanks for the tweak. One thing that it might be worth my mentioning here is that, though the mysterious machine might regard Elaine as a dragon, many of the dragons themselves may be unwilling to do so. Indeed those in the enemy faction might view her as a threat - or even an abomination - who needs to be eliminated.
JH
-
Hi! My name is Ib!
- Posts: 193
- Joined: Fri Nov 09, 2007 4:38 am