Over a Barrel

Ralph was in fine form as he shouted, "Barkeeper! Roll out one standard wooden barrel." Astra looked for the barkeeper, but could not see him. Ralph then said, "Gentlemen, we are going to have an extra special treat tonight. For the price of your admission, you all are going to get a chance - for a special prize." There was clapping and cheering. The crowd was thoroughly warmed up. "Now what do think it is going to be? A home-baked loaf of cinnamon bread?"

"No!" shouted the crowd.

"How about a souvenier plate from Frostbite Falls?"

"No!"

"A book of poetry from the library, perhaps?"

"Not only no, but hell no!" the lord shouted, and the crowd roared.

"Goodness me," said Ralph, "Let me think ...." His head turned toward Astra, as he looked her up and down. The crowd roared. Astra's face was turning a bit red. She was hoping that the crash backstage might offer her some relief, but whatever happened had not distracted the audience.

"Make way for the barrel!" a stout man shouted, as he rolled an oak cask down an aisle dividing the benches.

Ralph continued, "Gentlemen, this young lady will perform the trick of riding this barrel between here and the back bench. And then, backwards, back to the stage. I shall reward her with a drink of this fine, mild ale. Fit for a lady. And I trust that she will amaze us with her dexterity and poise. But, if the worst should happen ...." He sighed theatrically, "if, by some evil chance, she should fall, then I will trust that one of you will help break her fall, and return her to the barrel. I don't think that many of you could take her home ..." There was laughter. "But virtue is its own reward in this case. Agreed?" The crowd roared with mocking laughter. Astra looked into the faces of the men, and felt very much alone. Ralph continued, "But don't hold onto her for too long. When I say 'Master says,' you are to release her."

Ralph then raised his hands, and said, "Master says, stand on the barrel!"

The barrel bulged around its equator, and its flat ends were perpendicular to the ground. The top of the barrel came up to just above her knees. Astra gingerly stepped up on it, first with one leg, and then with the other. She leaned forward, placed one foot a bit back, and then the barrel slowly rolled forward. Ralph shouted, "Orchestra - some appropriate music."

In the back, was still in the cupboard, dazed by the crash. The two men had righted the cupboard quickly, but they did not attempt to force the doors. This was indeed strange, it was a piece of good luck for Fred, as he would not have been able to react quickly if someone had done so at that moment. After a few minutes, Fred heard some shouting, applause, and whistles. Fred steeled himself. He was determined to be a fool and burst out of the cupboard, consequences be damned. If there was somebody watching them he would throw one of the metal cans at him. He was lucky that one of them had a handle so that he could carry it.

Fred rammed the door with his shoulders, and there was little resistance - the doors had become almost unstuck after the fall. There was nobody here! He could now breathe the free air, and saw that he was carrying a can of paint. The orchestra started to play.

1. Fred gallantly walked forward toward the stage to see how he can help Astra.
2. Fred looked for some clothes.

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