One Stan: The Boring Secret Behind His Boring Life

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 77977

"Well." said Lots42 as he works his arms inside his own shirt. "As you know, I like bookstores and libraries."
"Ah, yes." said Barbara Walters. "The setting of so many Lots42 episodes."
"Bacon!" Lots42 shouts. Walters hushes. "Anyway, I was setting some of my typical nonsense in a chain bookstore and I had reason to mention an employee. I tried to refer to him in a high-falootin' way, like Londoners do when they aren't sipping teah. Instead of saying 'A guy named Stan', I said 'one Stan', as in indicating a very specific person NAMED Stan. Of course, the rest of the dillholes I work with had to go and 'call' him One Stan, as if that was actually his name and shit. And there you go, some otherwise obscure bookstore employee gets about enough screentime as Skip Hitler. Why? What's so freakin' special about Stan anyway?"
"Well." said Walters. "You have brought him back yourself many times before."
"My reality is impressive!" shouts Lots42 and falls out of his chair.

  1. He gets back in his chair and the interview continues.
  2. For some reason, Walters wants to know about 'furries', she thinks they are a some sort of ice cream treats.
  3. Walters runs out of the room.
  4. Josh, wearing a cardboard Lots42 mask, tied on with string, replaces Lots42. Walters does not notice.
  5. Walters asks Lots42 about the creepy feelings that writing 'Dark Tower' threads causes.

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Lots42 (Except for the pointless insults and insane rambling, the One Stan origin is true).

6/19/2008 9:15:30 PM

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