Clouds of Glory - The Scott Chen Story

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 75406

Scott collapses on the cold, wet pavement of the Starbucks parking lot, dropping the pistol in the process. He writhes and thrashes about in agony, clenching his head. “I know! I know!” he screeches. “I AM SHOUTING WHO IS BLAZES and WHAT IN BLAZES and WHAT IN a Degree of Something Down and WHAT IN HELL and WHAT IN HADES what I AM CREATING PHYSICALLY to IN DREAM STATE to a COMPLEX COMBINATION and OTHER THINGS FOR DETERRENTS and PUNISHMENT and even CURSES and MAXIMUM UP to MAXIMUM DOWN and therefore ACTUAL PHYSICAL Brain and Body you are MAXIMUM RESURRECTED IN for a Human to MAXIMUM PUT DOWN IN and this...” he pauses to take a deep breath. These manic fits, or ‘brain-f*cks’, are a good cardio workout.

“...DO YOU THINK I AM because for now years I have been TRYING LIKE A MANIAC to DROP to KILL and NOW to KILL to DROP IN THIS ORDER NOW Josh and Satan's Demons and Spawns what are ATTEMPTING to SPAWN to MANY MILLIONS to even over a BILLION to BILLIONS and to PHYSICALLY IN ADDITION to SPIRITUALLY to a Degree of Those to TAKE OVER ALL of Multiverse Earth and WIN this WAR in my brain!!!”

A shadow envelopes him then. He looks up, like a roach about to meet the bottom of a shoe, and squeals in terror. It’s Josh and, as always, his timing couldn’t be worse.

“I found a gun!” the moron beams ecstatically. He sticks the barrel up to his eye and pulls the trigger. Nothing happens.

“Damn,” Scott silently curses. “Must have spent the last round.”

“Well anyway,” Josh goes on, tossing aside the gun. “I thought you’d like to know that I can do this!” And he does a short, jerky dance. “Did you see!?”

Scott lays back on the pavement and closes his eyes. “Dammit, Josh. Just...dammit...I hate you so much.”

“Then why did you touch my body that one time...?”

Scott sits up and glares coldly at his hetero life partner/arch nemesis. “I was DRUNK!!!”

Josh scratches his head. “You were drinking sprite from the can...”

Scott rises to his feet and grabs Josh by the throat. “I WAS DRUNK!!!”

  1. Scott takes his second victim.
  2. Scott stops mid-strangle, and kisses Josh instead. It is a wet, sloppy kiss. Scott later goes on to blame his latte for his sexual indiscretions.
  3. Jerry Seinfeld, wiffle bat in hand, shows up. He's brought a long a small posse of funeral-goers. All are armed with wiffle bats.
  4. FFffFfFFFFfffff!

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4/12/2008 11:10:16 AM

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