oh the pain

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 73961

Reaibn is very anxious to show Lord Fred his antlers. So anxious, in fact, that he trips. Unfortunately, he trips in such a fashion that Fred, bent down to check on his cookies, gets impaled through the face. Death is, unfortunately, instantaneous.

"Holy sh--!" exclaims Reaibn. "Fred, buddy, you ok?" Reaibn then realizes that Fred will never, ever, be ok again. "Man, I am always doing that. Why did I cast that spell causing antlers to grow out of my head? Its not at all practical, except I can be my own coatrack."

Reaibn then begins the unpleasant process of removing Fred's face from his antlers. We will look away, as this gory and quite vile process continues. We will stare at the cave wall, not at Reaibn bashing his antlers against the wall in an attempt to 'smash' Fred off of them.

We will contemplate the quite delicious looking cookies that Fred was preparing, instead of seeing Reaibn peeling Fred off his antlers like an impaled tomato. We will continue to stare at the cookies, long after we would normally do so, to the point to where we HATE the cookies, but we can't look at Reaibn because of all the nasty squelching noises as his antler finally pops out of Fred's eyehole.

Now that is over, we can finally re-join Reaibn and the... remains... of Fred. His face is a tattered mess. Reaibn cleans the bits off his antlers with a random dishtowel, then covers Fred's disgusting face with it. He then scratches his chin and coughs. "Well... dang. I guess I have a few options here to deal with this situation. I am going to get in massive trouble with the Authors committee for killing this guy..."

What does Reaibn decide to do?

  1. Reaibn eats the cookies while making conversation with the remains of Fred
  2. Reaibn uses his necromantic powers to raise Fred from the dead. Its the adventures of Zombie Fred!
  3. Reaibn leaves the room screaming and waving his hands over his head.
  4. A funeral is performed outside the caves. Astra shows up and threatens Reaibn's life.
  5. A funeral is performed inside the caves. The dragon shows up and threatens Reaibn's life.
  6. Reaibn eats Fred (eeeu!)
  7. Reaibn makes up an elaborate plan to make it look like Fred was killed by the dragon
  8. The Authors committee show up. Reaibn is in trouble!

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Lord Reaibn Daenorth

3/4/2008 7:55:54 AM

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