The Never Ending Quest - Episode 666666: The Start of Kate's Quest

She stood before the gates of Hell. The Office of Evil had moved out of these facilities a long time ago--with increased attention from the other Offices and the rise of the Eternal Champions, they had had to become more subtle. They now tortured the souls of the damned in black sites across the multiverse, while the old Hell became nothing more than a tourist attraction. But not long ago, some power-hungry demons had come here in secret and drawn on its old magics to summon the one power that even the Office of Evil feared--the Unraveller. Now the existence of the multiverse itself was threatened--and she was the one who had to close the portal and save it.

She remembered Rule 34, representative of the Office of Order, speaking before the gathered Champions of three Terras:

"And so we send Princess Kate Tsukino Organa D'Honaire-Jones, Eternal Champion of Terra Incognita, New Guardian of the Pyramid of Balance, to vanquish the most terrible Unraveller. For aeons the Unraveller has ravaged the Manifold. Destroyed our worlds, warped our realities, and been an all around mean Unraveller.

"Princess Kate, take this map." The Power had handed her the map drawn up long ago by Dante. "Use it to locate the entrance to the gates of Hell. No God will be with you on your quest, but we have faith in you."

And now, the dark-skinned, pink-haired warrior stood before those gates. She looked at the map again. "This is where it should be..." she muttered to herself. The smells and sounds were just as they should be--she could hear the roaring of damnation's flames and smell the omnipresent sulphur. (Her senses were powerful even in human form. She was a werewolf, but she could change form at will since one of her ancestors was the Moon Princess.) The towering iron gateway stood above her, just as she was told, with the words "ABANDON HOPE ALL YE WHO ENTER HERE" written above.

But there were two gates, not one. The map didn't say anything about two gates. Kate threw it aside and wondered if a D'Honaire had ever found a map that wasn't worthless.

"Well, here goes nothing..." she said. "I guess I'll have to pick one... Which will it be?"

1. Kate enters the gate on the left.
2. Kate enters the gate on the right.

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