Meditations of Doom

"There is no God." Mark said, cracking his knuckles. "And if there was, I would kill him myself."

They heard music on the other side of the wall. It was like a loud, full orchestra, with a single female voice hitting disturbingly high notes. Then the music stopped, and the lights flickered off for a moment. When they came back on, someone was sitting in one of the closed-off stalls.

"Great." Mark sighed. "And the freak parade goes on."

"Listen carefully, young ones." said the mystery man in the toilet stall. "For your own safety, I can't tell you who I am or who I work for. But I have important information that you need to hear."

He was about to say something more when Mark dragged him out of the toilet stall and started beating the crap out of him. "Aargh!" the man exclaimed in alarm. He was unshaven and wore the uniform of a Cypriot naval officer.

"Who the hell do you work for?!" Mark yelled.

The man responded...

1. "...the government."
2. "...Sir Toby."
3. "...demonic extraterrestrial angels."
4. "...Elton John."
5. "...a cracker factory."
6. "...evil walruses."

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