In Our Next Episode, Mullet Man Faces His Arch-Enemy, AFRO-MAN!
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 48661
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Josh saw a Dateline episode about this. Identity Theft was the
fastest growing crime in the US, while Public Display of Inappropriate
Mullet (PDIM) trailed as a close but comfortable second. Josh has already
mastered the crime of PDIM over the last year, inspired by his childhood
hero ‘Mullet Man’, the super hero who prowled the trailer parks of
Alabama in search of beer. Now, Josh has no idea what he’s really looking for. Even if he found some innocent citizen’s discarded credit card bills or social security number, he doesn’t have the foggiest idea what to do with them. He crosses his eyes and slaps his forehead. “Duh!” he grunts. “Me not think so well. Brain hurt.” Hmmm. Lame episode so far. So, anyway, the lameness drags on...Josh targets the biggest trash can on the street, his theory being that the bigger it is, the bigger the income of the house. He finds a suitable one outside the well kept cul-de-sac a block over from where he arrived in his ‘beam- out’. He’s forced to fend off two angry racoons shortly after he claims it as his own. He barely wins the fight, and loses a substantial amount of blood. He presses on, despite the injuries, and eventually finds a small piece of paper soaked in old Pepsi and covered in coffee grinds. On it there is a social security number, date of birth, favorite color, deepest secret, secret crush, most evil act ever committed, etc. , etc., etc.“Now what the hell do I do now!?” Josh drones.
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Lost Soldier
1/20/2005 11:40:42 AM
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