I Don't Get The Appeal

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 45332

Scott threw open his door and races up three flights of stairs to meet his internet crush, who he had been crushing on for nearly fourteen years. Before he left, however, he tripped over the ever-present refrigerator box of condoms every grown man who lives on his own had.

"While I deeply respect the woman I am about to meet," he says, "I believe she may be very very very VERY attracted to me, so I should be prepared," he thought, "and bring some of my condoms, which are used during sexual relations," he thinks, "and believe me, I may just need a few, boy howdy, folks," he was saying. He filled his pockets with condoms, put about six on his actual member, and ran to the elevator.

Thirty-eight minutes later he arrived and knocks seductively on the door.

"Are you Scott from downstairs and from the internet and our chatting over the past fourteen years?" Kittie asked, her apparently beautiful eyes supposedly swimming with arousalness. For Scott.

"You bet your sweet bippy!" he was to growl manfully.

"Great!" she ostensibly giggled in a whirlwind of sensualness. I tell, ya, folks, she was hot to trot. "I've got DVDs and CDs and chocamilk and a job in radio all set for you!

"23 Skidoo!" Scott says, trying very hard not to look at her pretty shoes.

"Oooh," she was about to moan. "You're so nice and yet misunderstood!"

  1. The totally, for lack of several hundred thousand better terms, do it
  2. They don't do it -- whew! He doesn't need those sorts of entanglements
  3. A fiasco breaks out, leading to a debacle

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