Scott woke up with a delightful case of morning wood. He reached over to
grab Krissy and lovably force her head upon his plump member when he
realized he was alone in the bed. He heard the shower running in the
master bathroom. “Hmmm,” he said wonderingly. “I wonder.” The shower curtain slid upon suddenly, startling Krissy. “Get away from you freak!” she squeeled. Scott backed up some. “Christ, Krissy. I know the lights were a little dim last night but am I really all that bad?”Krissy continued scrubbing her nether-regions furiously. “YES!” “Well, you’re just a tease like all the others!” Scott raged. “I slip a few pills into your drink and you’re all over me and then the next morning it’s ‘Oh God, what have I done!?’” Krissy grabbed the shower curtain and yanked it shut. “You’ll never get away with this!”He snickered evilly. “Oh, but I shall!” Krissy started weeping again. “Oh, I should have known better!” she lamented. “I should’ve never hooked up with a stranger from the internet!” Scott sat down on the toilet. “Whatever. Look, I gotta take a crap and then I’m gonna borrow a couple CDs, then I’ll leave, okay?”“Fine! Just go!” “Fine.” “Fine.”Josh came back from the hospital later that afternoon. He looked like a mad-scientist’s creation gone wrong, with stitches criss-crossing his badly mutilated body and artificial limbs and such. “I won’t be here long,” he explained. “I’ve just come to pack up my stuff.” Scott paused his Bambi DVD and rushed to his feet. “Don’t screw with me right now,” he warned him. “Rent’s due in two days. Fork over the cash and you can take your stuff wherever you want.” Josh’s eyes reddened as tears formed. “You heartless bastard! I just got blown up by a grenade! All my savings has gone toward my medical bills! You know I’m broke!”“Go cry to Jerry Seinfeld!” Scott shot back. “I’m not the one who did it!” Josh sighed. “Well I don’t have any money.” Scott took him by the legs and threw him down the strangely inaccessible staircase. “Then good riddance.”
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9/12/2004 3:07:46 PM
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