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The sight of the dead Dragon is just too much for our beloved nobleman.
At first, Fred just stands there, frozen in place as if time itself has
stopped. Slowly, his jaw begins to tremble, then his knees, and finally
his entire body. His eyes redden, his face pales. He takes a few steps
backwards before collapsing altogether. Amidst his tears he goes into a
fit of nonsensical ranting. Astra quickly rushes to his side and, taking him in her arms, she begins to rock him back and forth like a newborn babe fresh from a mother’s womb, gently soothing him with calming words of comfort. “What the hell is the matter with you guys!?” you ask them angrily, completely caught off your guard by the whole situation. “It was a cold-blooded monster that fed on the innocent and devastated the entire region! You’ve both spent the better parts of your lives preparing to slay it, and now that that’s finally been accomplished you’re both acting like complete idiots! I need a #@*%ing cigarette!”“SHHHH!” Astra hushes you. “You’re upsetting him! Can’t you see you’ve done enough damage for one day!” She turns back to Fred, kissing him on the forehead. “It’s okay, mommy’s here. Everything’s gonna be alright. I won’t let that bad person hurt anyone else...” “Boobies?” Fred whimpers.“Yes, that’s right,” Astra whispers in his ear. “Boobies. Just think about boobies, lots and lots of boobies. Soft, supple...” “Oh give me a break!” you exclaim, lighting up a mentholated cancer-stick. “That’s all he ever thinks about! Now you’re encouraging him!? Is there something in the water!? FOCUS, people! We just rid the world of a great pestilence, likely earning ourselves a whole heaping wad of treasure and fame to boot in the process! We’re heroes now! Living legends! Our lives are set!”“But at what cost!?” Astra weeps. “The Dragon was just a victim of circumstance! How would you like being shunned by the world, forced to retreat into a dark, dank lair, always hunted, constantly on the look-out for would-be ‘heroes’!?” You can’t believe this is actually happening. “Astra, have you lost your damn mind!? This is the same Dragon that chained you up and toyed with your mind and body for it’s own idle amusement! The same Dragon that turned Fred against us!”“The same dragon that appreciated my true talents!” Astra snaps, rising to her feet. “The same Dragon that you murdered! You...you MURDERER!” “Whoah, easy now. C'mon, Princess. I don’t like the way you’re looking at me! Hey, heheheh, let’s just calm down before someone does something they’ll regret...”Astra’s eyes seem to glaze over with rage as she advances on you. “IT’S TOO LATE FOR THAT!”
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3/22/2004 4:23:14 PM
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