Tricks & Flippers
The Never Ending Quest - Episode 23229
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Even as Fred’s deranged maniacal mind pondered the possibilities he felt a
great amount of pain emanating from his leg. Upon looking down he saw the
wooden shaft of a bolt sticking out of his shin! "Ow!" Upon looking back
up he saw that the women were gone, their visages fading as if they were
ghosts or will’o’the’wisps. "Well, I’ll be! Guess that means my life
isn't taking a turn in a new direction."
"Ha!" screamed a voice full of rage and tremors of fear. "Make another move and the next bolt goes to your heart!" Although the pain of having a wooden hunting instrument puncture part of one’s body would take down a normal man, Fred was no normal man. "Where’d the girls go?" he asked. He was staring at the man holding the crossbow and noticed the spittle coming from his trembling lower lip, Fred started to smile. "Ha! That was nothing more than a trick from the Orvl McDggll!" He spoke bravely but was unnerved by this madman's smiling lips. "An’ a g’d trick i‘twas indeed, g’d thing I twas stayin’ th’ night here." The man with the strong dialect was Mrvn McDggll (pronounced more or less as Marvin Macdougal). He was the Orvl of the local shirebounds, a distaff representative of the GreenThumb, though when the naturalist-wizard- gardeners did come about he was treated more like a stable-boy than a prized sub-member of their guild. Fred burst out laughing. "WHAT did you say?" "What d’ya mean, WHAT di’ I say?" Fred was on the floor rolling with laughter. "Who taught you to talk, a little piggy from Gana?" The mini-mage was dumbstruck. No one had ever taken issue with his word choice or grammar, and indeed, most folks from these parts spoke just like him. "Stop tha'! Stop tha' right now!" Even as he was rolling Fred pulled at his boot and, before the crossbowman could react, flipped out and flung his skinning knife at him. With a K’THUNK and a GRGLL the man clutched at his now-slit throat, dropped the crossbow, and fell from the stairs. The Orvil began to speak a chant but got half a shaft in his gut as Fred reared up and kicked at him with his injured leg. Blood and guts poured out of the mini-magician’s stomach as Fred pulled his leg (and the shaft) out and away. The whole place was full of screaming and running and crying. Fred felt… good. Then, from out of nowhere, a large object hit him in the head. He nearly lost his bearings as more objects pounded at his head, neck and back. He picked one up and saw it was a flipper, the cooked flipper of a butchered baby seal! Running from that inn, and grabbing a few more pieces of the meat, he fled into the night.
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YY
1/1/2003 9:55:52 AM
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