Purgatory: Under New Ownership

"Don't sound so surprised. Satan was annoyed that, once their sins had been purged, all those in Purgatory got to go to Heaven. He wanted half of them to finish up here, but God wouldn't agree. Also there's much more room there. Hell was getting overcrowded. So Satan and all our demons bar me went to Purgatory and took it over. They've been changing the place to make it more like home, and now all our damned souls have also been sent there from here. When they arrived in Purgatory, the Astra woman launched her uprising, and enlisted a lot of the original residents of the place."

"So how do I get to Purgatory," Fred wanted to know.

1. "There's no way for you to get there."
2. "That's easy. I can send you there."
3. "If you've been a bit bad, but not too bad, then commit suicide and you'll finish up there automatically."
4. "I know how, but I'm not telling. You can't really hurt me with that sword. After all, I'm a demon."

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