On EAS Planet

It was a slow day in my office. I had a gut feeling that something bad was going to come in soon, but couldn't figure out just what. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife and serve it up for dinner, and there was so much of it you could hold a party for the entire cast of the Otherworlds thread and serve it as main course.

All those food metaphors were starting to get me hungry. So I was going to go for something to eat, when suddenly, this dame walked in.

She was the most gorgeous dame I'd ever seen in my life. She was a live one, I could tell. She had that air about her that you see in real people and don't in deadheads, VRs, and boomers. She was a blond, lithe, tall, and voluptuous, with gorgeous sky-blue eyes. If it weren't for that haughty scowl on her face, she'd be the most gorgeous dame on EAS Planet. I shuddered. Gorgeous broads always meant trouble.

"Are you John Thessamar?" she asked me. She had a haughty, aristocratic tone.

"No, I'm Pamela Anderson. John Thessamar lives next door. That name on my front door is just a misprint."

The broad scowled but said nothing. "I'm Melinda Griffith. I need your help."

"Author- spawn, eh?" I said. "There aren't very many Griffiths on EAS Planet."

She scowled even worse. Was this broad even capable of smiling? I wondered. "Yes, I am the great-great-granddaughter of Brian Griffith, the Traveller. Don't be disrespectful to me."

"I'm not. I'm one myself. I'm the multi-great-grandson of the original John Thessamar." That silenced her. My family is practically royalty on EAS Planet. John Thessamar--born John Hall--was one of the greatest and most prolific writers of Story One. He invented the VR manifestation process by accident, when trying out a new program that would automatically create illustrations based on text. He tried it out on an episode of Story One that had Astra Thessamar, a really gorgeous Story One character who he had helped to create. But there was this power surge, and Astra became real. They married, and Sir Toby himself tried a version of the program on the second story, "The Black Void." He was able to create a virtual-reality environment that simulated the story. The technology caught on, and the internet became the VRnet. As the space program went on, the VRnet took up more and more memory, and had to become interstellar. The memory was broken up over several planets, and really large sites—like this one—would sometimes gain a planet of their own.

My branch of the family didn't get any of the perks that go with being of Authorial descent, though. The original John Thessamar disinherited my multi-great-grandfather after he started a terrible flamewar that almost destroyed the VRnet. Ever since then, my family's had to eke things out and take things as they come. Me, I make my living as a private eye. The Story Cops and people in higher society don't like us, but the money's good and the dames are gorgeous.

1. "Very well then," said Melinda. "I'll explain."

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