The Ballad of Big Joe and Phantom 309

She just stares at you blankly. You quickly realize that you need to say something fast to save this conversation.

"...like my RECORD COLLECTION!" you blurt out. "It's huge! Do you wanna go see it?"

The woman finally smiles, despite the blatant sexual harassment in the previous couple of episodes. "Sure!" she exclaims. "Two hipsters looking through a record collection is more fun than having depraved sex on the street!"

You take the girl by the hand and you both go home to see your record collection, which you've seen every day for as long as you've been collecting. You really don't need to look at them again.

1. The two of you get home and geek out over records.
2. Eventually, after several hours of listening to music, you begin making out with the woman.
3. Your record collection is actually small and humiliating. Just like something else of yours!

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