Fred vs. the Dragon: Round One

The Never Ending Quest - Episode 38662

The noble dragonslayer Lord Frederigo D'Honaire ran through the caves at lightning speed, waving his banana around and shouting "Geronimo!" (The name of a famous Dolomite painter.) As he ran, he passed a coven of witches, a horde of orcs and several vampires, but all of them were too puzzled by the sight of an armed knight waving a banana around and shouting "Geronimo!" that they didn't know what to do until he had long gone.

Eventually, he reached an enormous, treasure-filled cavern in which lay sprawled the Dragon. He was as puzzled by the sight of Fred as everyone else had been. In a trice, Fred leaped at the dragon and stuffed the banana in its nose.

Nothing happened. Fred stared at the dragon in utter shock. The dragon started laughing.

"Why did you stuff a banana up my nose?" said the dragon in a deep, rich voice.

"To kill you!" shouted Fred defiantly.

"Why did you think stuffing a banana up my nose would kill me?"

"Because the vitamin B, combined with whatever it is that makes a banana yellow, would cause your lungs to explode!"

"Who told you that?"

As Fred realized how familiar this conversation was getting, he shouted "You can't fool me! You're really Belboz the Necromancer in disguise, aren't you?"

"Who's that?"

"The person who told me to stuff a banana up your nose."

"Why would you want to stuff a banana up my nose?"

"To kill you!"

"Why did you think stuffing a banana up my nose would kill me?"

"Because the vitamin B, combined with whatever it is that makes a banana yellow, would cause your lungs to explode!"

"Who told you that?"

"Stop trying to change the subject! You're really Belboz the Necromancer in disguise, aren't you?"

"Who's that?"

"The person who told me to stuff a banana up your nose."

"Why would you want to stuff a banana up my nose?"

"To kill you!"

"Why did you think stuffing a banana up my nose would kill me?"

"Because the vitamin B, combined with whatever it is that makes a banana yellow, would cause your lungs to explode!"

"Who told you that?"

"Stop trying to change the subject! You're really Belboz the Necromancer in disguise, aren't you?"

"Who's that?"

"The person who told me to stuff a banana up your nose."

"Why would you want to stuff a banana up my nose?"

"To... to... GYEARGH!" Fred lunged at the dragon and chopped its head off in one blow.

  1. Surprisingly, this actually killed it.
  2. But it wouldn't die and wouldn't shut up.
  3. Not really caring whether the dragon is dead or not, Fred leaves and decides to retire from dragonslaying once and for all.

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8/11/2004 1:22:02 PM

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